I always chuckle to myself when I read blogs, tweets, or am party to a conversation that ventures down the “$*&%*) ain’t SHIT!” road (and you can insert your own explicative).
It makes me laugh that the actions of one person can reflect on a whole group of people. It’s ridiculous. Generalizations like that can make it easy for folks to overlook the treasure they might have right in front on them.
Case and point, most of the men I call my friends are GOOD MEN. *That most is a disclaimer. I’d say all and then one of my friends would go do something trifling to make me a liar*. They have dreams, they have goals, and they are actively working toward them. If dreams and goals sounds like repetition, let me clarify. Anybody can be a dreamer, but a dream doesn’t mean much to me if there isn’t some kind of plan that can make it a realizable goal.
I’m not saying this is the case with EVERY man, but I know a lot of good men who happen to have children. Some of what makes them good men is the way they interact with their children (especially their daughters) but for me, it shines through with how they treat their friends.
I have a friend I’ve known for more than a couple of years now. While we don’t talk all the time (and I feel like that’s true with most of my friends) I feel like our conversations count. Still, my esteem for this man grew by leaps and bounds over the past weekend.
I went to his hometown this past weekend. Even though he was in the middle of a move, he made (and realized) and effort to see me. He has a child, and though I speak to him while he has her and have often heard him talk about her, this weekend was the first time I have ever had a chance to see them interact.
I have seen daughters love their Daddy’s (and I am a daughter who LOOOOOVES her Daddy), but it was MORE than clear that his daughter was in love with him. It seemed like every time she thought about it she was going to hug his legs, or ask him a question, or come where he was to see what he was doing. Maybe in itself it doesn’t seem like anything all that remarkable, but I’ll tell you this: not all father’s are there for their children in that way. He took his time talking to her, all while entertaining his guests and taking care of a sick loved one. I’ll tell you this, too: while he is a grown ASS man, he’s still under 25. He’s a good man. I dare ANYONE to dispute it.
He’s also taken.
I got to see another friend of mine who (coincidentally) also has a child on this same visit. While I can’t say I’ve seen him interact with his son, I have had a chance to pick his brain about his life choices. He happens to be a single father, so while he certainly has goals of his own (and is actively working toward realizing them) he also makes it a point to consider how his choices will impact his child. Maybe you’re reading this and thinking “what’s so exceptional about that?” Again, I pose the question: how many men can you say you know who are single father’s and making it work for their children? He is also under 25.
He is single, and proof positive that not all good men are taken.
I could go on and give examples, but I don’t think that’s necessary. These two men are prime examples that not all good men are taken (even though one of them is) and good reason for women to stop saying “there aren’t any good man out there”. Yes there are. Where are you looking?